Brother
by Jenrya Lee
Summary: Sasuke Uchiha suffered greatly on the night of his parents death. Here, he remembers that fateful night and those awful words his brother whispered in his ear.... "Grow up so that you may kill me." CHAPTER 5 UP! COMPLETED!
1. Chapter 1

**Naruto: **Brother

**By**: Jenrya Lee

**Note**: Hi! This is my first Naruto fanfic, but not my first ever fanfic. 

**Story**: Sasuke Uchiha reflects on the death of the Uchiha clan four years ago...And it isn't easy.

**Story Note**: No yaoi, yuri, or anything like that.  

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto! Masashi Kishimoto has those happy, happy rights!!

            A young boy, with dark, blue-black hair and sharp, grey eyes, sat behind a desk, taking notes. His hand was swift with his pen, as were his eyes, which ran back and forth to take in all the notes on the board as possible. These notes where to be extremely helpful in the next test, even though he never really _needed _to study in order to good. Just as he had finished copying the notes, the bell rang, signaling the end of the lesson. The boy gathered his belongings, and headed out the door.  The second his fingers grasped the door knob, his teachers hand grasped the boys shoulders.  The boy turned around, his grey eyes staring right into the teachers. he was eager to get home, and he was already late.

            "I'd like to talk to you about your most recent test." The teacher said. The boy sighed, but reluctantly followed his teacher to the back of the room.

            "Yes, sensei?" The boy asked.

            "You scored the highest in the class once again. As of right now, no one has ever been able to beat your marks. Especially in shuriken practice. I think you're getting closer to your brothers level. You might even beat him one day!" The teacher smiled warmly, clearly not seeing the negativity in his words, and clearly not noticing the sour look on the boys face.

            "May I leave? I am already late...." The boy said, looking at his watch. The teacher nodded, and let the boy go.

~*~*~*~

            The boy was walking to the very end of the village, where his clan resided. He stopped, dead in his tracks, around a hundred feet from the beginning of the homes that belonged to his clan. He saw several people from his clan, lying in the street, silent, unmoving. Blood from their wounds colored the ground into an ugly brick red. The boy, although scared, urged himself to continue. Once the preliminary shock of all the scenes of blood and gore that surrounded him faded, a frightened thought ran through his head.

            'Mom...Dad!'

            The boy was running was fast as his legs could carry him now, hoping to get home in time.

            Hoping he wasn't too late. He prayed that his parents would be there, welcoming him home. 

            He ran with all his might, but once he stood right outside his door, he froze.

            He was scared at what he would find if he opened that door. Scared that he would walk right into his death. What if the killer was in his house right now? But he pushed those thoughts to the side, anxiousness taking over him. He fumbled with his keys, and they dropped to the floor. The boy's hands were shaking now, and it seemed like a struggle just to pick his keys up off the floor. It seemed like ages before he actually got the door open. But he managed it. He turned the doorknob, and pushed open the door....

_Four Years Later_

            A boy awoke from a terrible dream. His shirt stuck to his body in sweat. His cold grey eyes were colder now, and lacked the life they had when he was younger. Those cold grey eyes scanned the room for the glass of water he usually had near him before he went to sleep. He found it and greedily drank the once-cold-but-now-warm water. Wiping his mouth on his pajamas sleeve, he laid back down in bed. He realized that his heart was still beating intently fast, and the boy tried to regulate his breathing, which were now coming out in quick, short gasps. His grey eyes looked up at the moon. He frowned up at it He has awoken just before the worst part of the dream. The same dream haunted him everyday now for four years. They were relentless in their quest to ruin the boys life.  But even though the dream was cut off tonight, he knew it all too well. He had, after all, experienced it first hand. He remembered, opening the door, to find an insane older boy over his parents. The older boys eyes where bright red and crazy, and he was smirking. Blood covered is hands and clothes. He was holding a blood stained knife. The older boy was standing above his own _parents_, and it took the younger boy a few seconds  to realize what was going on. His parents were dead. And the one who murdered them, along the rest of the clan, was the twelve year old prodigy of the clan, Itachi Uchiha.

            His _brother_.

            The younger boy wanted to run away, when Itachi saw him. "Hello, Sasuke." He said, smirking, his teeth exposed. Sasuke's legs were stuck to the floor. His own blood in his veins seemed to freeze. He couldn't even move. He was just so _scared_. Itachi walked over to his brother, letting the knife leave his hands. It hit the floor with a thud. Itachi opened his eyes, which were still red and crazy. _Why are his eyes red?_ Sasuke thought. Then, a terrible realization hit him hard. _The Sharingan!! _The clans highest ability, the Sharingan...allowing one to do amazing things with their eyes alone. Sasuke almost forgot that his brother had that ability. Sasuke tried to run once again, but to avail. His brothers eyes caught his. Itachi's Sharingan ability ran through every cell in Sasukes body before a numbness hit his head. His brother then forced an image into his brothers head. _He was forcing the image of his dead parents into his younger brothers mind._ Repeatedly. By the time Itachi's eyes released Sasukes, Sasuke felt as if he had seen the terrible image for three days straight. Silent tears flowed down his cheeks. Even when his brother stopped his evil spell, he still saw the image in his head. 

            "Never forget your pain. Live with pain and anger towards everybody. Grow up so that you'll be able to kill me. I _order_ you." And with those words, Itachi left his fear-frozen brother by himself.

            Sasuke stood there, in front of this terrible massacre, for two days straight. He just stood there, not sleeping or even blinking. He had suffered such a terrible shock that he would never fully recover from it. That's when someone stumbled into town, and realized what happened. It was reported to the Hokage, who sent men to search the area for survivors. The team who found Sasuke told him he was so out of it when the found him that when they carried him away all he did was cry pitifully. It took a whole week afterwards for him to even start speaking again.

            But he still cried. And each time he cried, his brothers words burned into his ears. At first, he decided to not listen to them. If he killed his brother, he would be as bad as him. 

            It was at his parents funeral when he snapped. Sasuke cried uncontrollably. He got on his knees in front of his parents coffin and cried for ages. He hadn't fully realized until now that he would never see them again.

            And that's when he realized that the one who killed them should suffer. At that point on, Sasuke understood his goal in life.

            To kill his brother.

(Jenrya: I'm really thinking of making this a one-shot. I might continue it, because I've got a few ideas on how to continue it, but only if I get enough reviews and if people really want me to continue. I hope you liked it! Anyway, Read and Review!! Ja ne!)


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

(Jenrya: Thank you so much for all the reviews! I dedicate this chapter to Jason, whose a really good friend of mine. Well, with that said, continue reading and enjoy!)

_One year later / Age Nine_

            Sasuke had grown up extremely fast after the death of his parents. Perhaps too fast. Right now, he was seated in front of the graves of his two parents. His little pointer finger traced over the names of his parents. He bit back tears, and felt his lip bleed from biting it so hard. But it didn't care, really, about his lip. He was just so numb inside, now.

            Itachi Uchiha.

            Sasuke paused for a moment, realizing, not for the first time, that his brothers name was the same as their mothers. The boy remembered hearing his brother complain about inheriting a woman's name, but his mother firmly said that 'Itachi' was a unisex name, and that she'd never give her children a humiliating name to grow up with for the rest of their lives.

            The raven-headed boy shook his head, trying not to remember his brother right now. Memories of his brother often spawned into memories of that awful night... He preferred to focus on his parents. The boy paused, and picked up two bouquets of flowers, placing them in front of the graves. He apologized aloud for not being able to get anything better, but explained that he was living solely on funds from the Hokage. Sasuke has pleaded with the Hokage several months back for some financial help, and Sasuke never pleaded. The Hokage agreed, of course. Sasuke was starving when he asked the Hokage for money. However, the boy still told the head of the village to keep this strictly between the two of them, and that was understood as well. So, every week from then on, the boy received enough money to sustain himself. The local gas, water, and electric companies, after hearing of the death of the entire clan, took pity upon Sasuke, who was, in their eyes, a lonely orphan who could hardly take care of himself. They never charged the boy with anything. 

            The boys hands, scarred and cut from frequent practice with kurai knives and shuriken, were clasped together in a silent prayer. When he finished, he moved on to the next grave.

            This would be a very long day.

~*~

            When Sasuke got home, he was exhausted. But he still has a lot of work to do. It ws his own decision not to get any help housework-wise. He loaded up what little laundry there was into the washing machine, which frequently stopped working since it was extremely old now. He remembered that his mom wanted to desperately buy a new one, and she was about to, but then, well...

            Sasuke sat in front of the washing machine, because if he left it, then it might overflow and flood the room. He sighed sadly, thinking about how he'd have to do this once a week for the next god knows what, and took a small book out to read on different ninja techniques. He got so caught up in the book that he didn't realize that the machine was flooding. He cursed when he finally noticed as the water touched his bare feet. He jumped up and noticed that his book fell in the water. Sasuke noticed almost immediately as he picked the book up that Itachi's neat script had been scribbled a note in the inside cover of the book.

_To Sasuke,_

_            This is for all the times that I broke my promises. I hope you'll learn as much as you can from this book._ _I wish that I was able to teach everything in here myself, but I can't. And I'm sorry for that. So, I really hope you'll forgive me...?_

_                                                                                                            From Your Loving Brother,_

_                                                                                                                        Itachi_

            Sasukes eyes widened as he read the now water logged message. He has completely forgotten that his brother had given him this book as a gift.

            'Why...? Why did you–'

            Sasuke couldn't even finish his thought before he collapsed to the floor, crying. He remembered how loving, how kind, how sweet his brother had been. So then why did he kill everyone in the clan?

            Sasuke continued crying for a good fifteen minutes, before he noticed the water soaking his pants. He got up, turned off the washing machine, and returned to his spot on the water-filled floor to cry. His eyes stung, his head hurt, and he was cold from his clothes that were now completely soaked through.

            But he just didn't care anymore.

_Three Years Later_

Twelve year old Sasuke Uchiha was walking through his room his face emotionless. He scanned the bookshelves for anything that he no longer desired, and spotted a small, water logged book among the others. He took it out, his cold eyes scanning his brothers note. Sasukes face grew cold, but there was a sadness in his eyes that could make even the strongest man cry. But all he did was throw the book into the garbage and mutter darkly under his breath.

            "I don't need this kind of shit right now. I have things to do." And so the boy walked away to go and train.

            But the tiniest of voice in the back of his head, which was in fact what little childhood innocence he had left, or perhaps it was merely a shadow of the innocence he _used_ to have...Yet, that tiny voice whispered to the boy to show some emotion. To let some of the pain, and anger, and hate, to let some of it escape through salty tears. The boys eyes looked at the book once more, and he was now fighting to keep back the memories that were attached to it. However, the darker side of him, the side that was stronger, had quickly destroyed those pure words that the innocence spoke, and the boy was emotionless once again. 

            And the window of his soul was beginning to open, too. That book could have purified his soul and return the light that he had lost. What a shame...that his inner demons made sure that the boy never smiled again.

            And the boy himself was beginning to doubt that he ever would.

            The darkness that had grown in his heart that were born from his brothers cold words always kept their hands firmly around the light, making sure none got out. The darkness was relentless in it's quest to ruin the boys life.

            It was successfully doing it's mission, and there was nothing left in the boy to stop it. Besides, he would have ended up destroying himself without 'their' help. He wanted to be like this. Cold, empty, emotionless. It was the only way he could accomplish his goal.

            And he would accomplish it even if he died trying.

(Jenrya: Well, that's the end to chapter 2. I'm working as fast as I can on this. Anyway, next chapter won't be so angsty. I'll try my best to get that up fast. R&R!)


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

(Jenrya Lee: I LOVE YOU REVIEWER PEOPLE!!! *hugs reviewers* Oh, one more thing: to the reviewer Aqua: I might include Kakashi, but I don't know much about him. But I'll see. Maybe I'll add him later on. ^^ Ok, now, continue!)

_Two years later/ Age Ten_

            Sasuke had always been the closest of friends with his oldest male cousin, Yuki. Even though he was twenty, he was still very childlike in nature, and could bring a smile to anyone's face. Yuki wasn't exactly very strong, but his mind was sharp, and he dreamed of being a teacher. Of course, it was unheard of in the Uchiha clan to become anything but a warrior, and yet, Yuki still strived for his goal. By most of the Uchihas, he was stupid and foolish, but Sasuke thought he was daring and determined. Willing to do anything in order to accomplish his dream. And with that little reminiscent, Sasuke went to sleep.

            He dreamt of his cousin, walking toward him on the night of his death. He bore a wound in his stomach; his hand was the only thing keeping anything in now. Blood soaked his hair, and every time he opened his mouth to speak, his words were stopped by the blood that filled his throat, and dripped down his lips. The tears that left his eyes turned red from the blood that dried on his cheeks.

            Blood. Sasuke had seen so much of it on one night.

            His cousin collapsed to the ground, and from the amount of blood he coughed up, Sasuke knew the wound was fatal. He turned his face from his suffering cousin, only to stare into the eyes of other people he knew dying. He walked towards them. They were all begging to be saved. The ones who couldn't beg just spit out blood in their attempt to talk. They circled around Sasuke, pulling at his clothes, tugging at his hair. And then Yuki crawled his way through the crowd just to grab Sasukes ankles. Sasuke crouched down to tell his friend that everything was going to be alright, to tell him that he wouldn't die. But Yuki then collapsed, dead. His eyes rolled to the back of his head, and his cold hand released his grip on the raven haired boy.

            All the others tightened their circle around Sasuke, and they were all covered in blood.

            "It's your fault....your fault....your fault...." the crowd chorused. Sasuke covered his ears, but his attempt to drown out his dead companions voices were futile.

            And that's when he woke up. His scream pinched through the air and carried on the wind. His clothes were soaked to his skin, and he shivered from the cold sweat. And then, he placed his head in his hands and cried. Trying to keep the dark demons that filled his past was getting harder by the day. His sobs where carried to the street, where several people looked up to see who was crying. Then, they shrugged it off, and continued to walk. So, the boy continued to cry until there was no more energy left in him. He laid his head on his pillow. Even though he was too tired to open his eyes, he was awake, aware. But after several minutes of nothing but quiet darkness, a picture flashed in front of his eyes.

            A women, with long, flowing black hair, was sprawled on the floor, dead. Her eyes, once large, grey, and beautiful, were now lifeless and empty. Her face was white. Her throat was slit, and blood, when it had been still flowing in her, covered her shirt, making it stick to her body.  Her hands were limply wrapped around her neck, in an obvious attempt to stop the bleeding. But all it did in the end was make her hands red, wet and sticky. Her husband was next to her, also dead. A kunai knife stuck out of his chest, and his hands were wrapped around it, trying to pry it out when he had still been alive. In his last minutes of life, he knew his death was approaching, so he stopped fighting it. He was able to close and eyes and wait for the inevitable to happen.

            They were both Sasuke's parents.

            It took all of Sasukes strength to open his eyes and end the dark recollection. His eyes filled with tears again, and every time he closed them, he saw the same, gore-ish picture. A few minutes of this was all the boy needed to get up and head over to the bathroom. After washing his face and dabbing his eyes with cold water, he opened the medicine cabinet. He looked through it roughly, quickly disorganizing it. But it didn't matter to him now what the state of his cabinet was, he just needed to find something in particular _now_. He could always reorganize that cabinet! He finally found two bottles, both with his name on it. The first said, "Anti-Depressant". The boy frowned and but those pills back. He didn't need them now...what he needed was sleep. Which is why he took the second bottle, which was labeled, "Sleeping Pills". The boy got a glass of cold water from the sink, then opened the bottled one-handedly with his thumb. The lid almost fell to the floor with a 'clink', but the boy easily caught it in midair. Once he took two pills, he popped them into his mouth and drank the cup of water. He re-filled the glass and took the bottle with him to bed. He might need them again tomorrow.

            The boy slipped into bed, pulled the sheets up to his chin, and slept.

            And for the rest of the night, he had a temporary reprieve from the blood and pain.

            But it was only temporary. And it was almost guaranteed that by the time he woke up, the demons would be back, stronger then ever, haunting him more to make up for his one night of solitude.

            Yet, for now, he was in a state of pure bliss, because he dreamt of nothing, and so nothing could bother him. 

            For tonight, at least.

_Two Years Later_

            Sasuke, in a rage, ripped open the medicine cabinet. He rummaged through it quickly, until he found a roll of gauze and a bottle of alcohol. His eyes watered from the stinging pain that the alcohol had caused as it bit into his skin. Then, he wrapped the gauze quickly and firmly around his wound after applying the alcohol. He had been practicing with kunai, and he fumbled. The kunai knife had fallen onto his skin. Yet, luckily for the boy, it feel on it's side rather then on it's tip, so all it did was give him a nasty gash on the palm of his hand. But it would heal. If he took care of the wound carefully, he might not even get a scar. But the boy didn't worry about that now. Now, he was mad at himself for being clumsy with the knife. Sasuke ended up hurting himself because he held the knife wrong. Itachi never, ever made a stupid mistake like that. His brother was flawless in the ways of the ninja.

            So who would ever suspect him of being a mass-murderer? 

            Sasuke's wound throbbed now. The boy had wrapped the gauze _too_ tightly, and now the circulation to his hand stopped. The boy quickly ripped the gauze off, then re-wrapped it, being more careful now to not wrap it to tightly. Then he returned the roll back to the medicine cabinet. 

            The number of medicines and pills had grown considerably over the ages. The boy couldn't help it; grief was something he really couldn't deal with all that well. Sure, when people looked at him, they saw a strong, young, cold young man who could deal with anything, or anyone. But in reality, he thought himself to be the opposite.  In Sasuke's eyes, he was weak. He was too old, and he was too open. How was he weak? He only learned to control his sharingan at age 12. How was he old? He graduated his school and became a genin at age 12. How is he too open? Well, he actually cares about his teammates. Itachi wasn't like that. 

            And if Sasuke Uchiha has any chance of defeating his brother, he would have to be exactly like him. He had to; if he didn't who would avenge his family? He had to do it, because Sasuke now represented what the Uchiha clan was.

            He had the weight of the world on his shoulders, it seemed. And he didn't want it. He didn't want all this responsibility. He wanted to be a normal child. He wanted to be happy, and just grow up like everyone else. But he couldn't. He could never be normal. Not until Itachi was dead. And he needed to learn to deal with that.

            All the medicines and pills in his medicine cabinet proved that he couldn't.

            'It's kill...or be killed. That's what my life is...  I die, or my brother dies...' the boy thought bitterly, as he cleaned up the cabinet.

            Right now, he needed to do what was expected by him. Maybe then, once he did what was necessary, he'd be okay. He's might even be able to lead a normal life after his brother was dead.

            How sad it is, to be forced to kill someone who meant so much to you, years ago. To be forced to kill someone who meant the world to you, who you looked up to, who you basically worshiped.

            How sad.

(Jenrya Lee: GOMEN NASAI! I had writers block! Intense writers block! I am so sorrrry! I WILL UPDATE FASTER NEXT TIME.....If I get reviews, that it. Review, please!)


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

(Jenrya Lee: Oh...I'm not getting too many reviews...wah! But maybe it's because the Naruto section isn't that popular? *stares at number of stories in Naruto section* Never mind....Read, and please, please, review!)

_Three years later/ Age Eleven_

            A raven haired boy was dragging a large bucket, filled with water. A mop was held awkwardly between his arm and side. The boy was having difficulty going around corners, and water from the bucket splashed onto the floor. The boy dully turned around, his dark grey eyes going over the spilled water. The boy mentally shrugged. He placed the bucked in the middle of his bare living room floor. He had moved the carpet out of the way, and now dry blood was stained into the floor. The boy swept the floor with the wet mop, knowing that the blood wouldn't go away. But he didn't really care. That wasn't why he was mopping every floor in the house. It was because he hadn't done it in a while and the dust that had accumulated was making his allergies go haywire.

            And even if it did get the stained blood off the floor, the blood he saw when he closed his eyes wouldn't go away, no matter how often he saw the Konoha psychologist, who always sat three inched away from him, blinking once every four seconds. She always told him that the only way to get rid of the dreams, and the awful memories, was to move out of the house. It held to many bad memories, she said. When she said that, Sasuke stood up so fast his chair fell to the floor. He yelled at her so loudly that the whole building heard him. How dare she tell him where he should live? He could live in a damn cardboard box, for all she cared. But he was not going to move out of his house. No way.

            The boys thoughts wandered back to cleaning, so he dipped the dirty mop into the equally dirty water. He would have changed it by now, but decided against it. The bathroom was too far way. 

            Once the boy thought he did a satisfactory job, he moved onto his uncles room. Then his aunt. Then his cousin Yuki, and his little sister Ichiga. She was only 6 when she was killed, and she was found clutching her pink teddy bear, with the matching pink strawberry t-shirt. It was her favorite. Yuki, who knew a bit of English, called Ichiga 'Strawberry', because 'Ichigo' in Japanese means exactly that. From that day on, everything she owned had a large red strawberry on it. It slightly annoyed her mom, who was Sasuke's mothers sister, because Uchiha's were usually dark, and hardly ever wore anything but blue and black. But her sister told her to let the girl do what she wanted, because by the time she would be ten she would have grown out of it. Sasuke could still feel her lingering presence in the room, and could almost smell her strong, fruity shampoo. She really looked up to her raven haired, older cousin. She would always ask him to help her tie her shoes, or comb her hair. But she hated Itachi. She said he scared her.

            Sasuke though now, that if he had listened to her, maybe she wouldn't dead. Maybe she wouldn't be buried in a baby-blue coffin with her teddy bear still clutched to her chest. And maybe Yuki wouldn't be buried next to her, his face rigid, completely erased of the easy-going facade he always had. 

            The boy dropped his mop, and bent down to pick it up, when he something caught his eye. On Yuki's wall, which was hardly even his, because his little sister always plastered her stuff there, was a childish drawing. It was scribbled, chicken-scratched sort of art. But the raven haired, cold eyed boy wanted to cry.

            Because that scribbled, chicken-scratched picture was of _him_. The boy bit back tears until he could taste the blood from his cut lip. He threw the mop on the floor and ran to his parent room, which was nearest, and threw himself on the bed, mentally telling his stinging eyes not to shed a tear.

            And he didn't. Instead, he had a tantrum. He grabbed a picture of his parents on their wedding day, and flung it halfway across the room. It hit the wall, and the glass protecting the picture shattered into a million little pieces. The boy realized what he did, and ran the end of the room, picking up the picture. Some rather sharp pieces of glass cut into his skin, leaving a small jagged cut. But the boy ignored it, and frantically patted the remaining shards away. His palm was a bloody mess by the time he was done, but he hardly felt it. He carefully examined the picture to make sure it was intact. The actual picture, miraculously, was untouched. The boy took a deep breath of relive, and put the picture back, face down. Now, he had to sweep up the shards and mop again. The boy scolded himself for not having better control over his emotions, and went to get the mop. His eyes narrowed in his annoyance. He also had to clean out all his cuts, which would take a while. He decided to do that first, or else he'd get an infection and they'd have to cut off his hand.

            Well, it wasn't that bad of a cut, so he wouldn't need it to be amputated. But he didn't want to take his chances. He took out a disinfectant cream. It did the same thing alcohol did, but didn't burn like hell. He rubbed it around his cut, and placed it back. He then went back to cleaning the house. 

            The very large, very empty, once prestigious, Uchiha Clan house.

            And he had to do it all by himself.

_One year later_

            The Uchiha house was still spotless, and the boy who cleaned it all was taking a well deserved shower. He washed quickly and efficiently, wiping away all the dirt and dust that stuck to his skin and hair. He shampooed his hair, and his hand ran up his neck, rubbing the seal he had there. He thought about the man who gave it to him, Orochimaru, and how he said that Sasuke had greater potential then his brother.

            'Sure. Boost my ego while you're trying to kill me.' The boy thought bitterly, sticking his head under the nozzle. He washed his face, brushed his teeth, rinsed out the bar of soup, and stepped out of the shower. He swore to himself when he realized he didn't bring any clean clothes. He wrapped a towel around his slim waist and walked to his room, taking out a fresh set of clothes. He returned, shivering, to the bathroom, pat-dried his hair, dried his body, and slipped into his clothes. He smiled to himself. He just realized he covered himself being looking for clothes. 

            'Not like there's anyone here to see me naked...' He thought to himself. He combed his hair hurriedly, put his shoes on, and headed out the door to go shopping. He stared at his shopping list. He only received around one hundred dollars for food a month, because Naruto, who was also an orphan, needed money too. But most of the shop keepers refused Sasuke's money, no matter how loud he yelled or how persistent he was in his goal to pay for his food.

            "No, no, I have enough to pay for this, believe me–"

            "Oh, I know. But spend it on something else. Ok?" All the shopkeepers would say, patting the boys head like he was a dog or something. Sometimes, the blue-clad boy wanted to scream, to the whole world, "I don't need your charity!!" But then he'd stare at the money in his hand, and shut up. He may not like it, but without the towns charity, he'd starve. He never touched what was in the Uchiha bank account, mainly because of the fact that that money went toward the burial of his family (which, Sasuke insisted, he would pay back every dime he took out of that account once he saved enough). But he hated feeling poor. When his family was alive, he was actually exceptionally spoiled. He'd buy everything that he wanted, and when it came to the holidays, he'd nearly drown in presents. Now, he didn't even buy himself a decent birthday cake. He actually didn't buy one for a year now. What was the point of having a party if no one was there?

            The boy wandered to the vegetable section, and he grabbed a few hearty ones and threw them in his basket. He went to the bread section, and picked up several different ones. He bought just enough for him to get all of his nutrients and the sort, and never a dollar more. Of course, if he went to the Hokage and showed him all of his receipts, he would get more money. But he has never had to that since he started getting the loans. (Which is what they are, Sasuke told himself. Loans. I _will_ pay everyone back.) So why start now? The Uchiha passed the fruit section, and realized they had a huge sale on strawberries. He did not frown, nor show any emotion. He was in public. His mind, ignoring his orders to not to, wandered to his cousin. 

            _"Sasu-Kun, Sasu-Kun, could you lift me, please? I'd like to see the 'stawberties'."_

_            "They're not 'stawberties' Ichiga.  They're strawberries!"_

_            "Straw-ber-ries. Ok! Got it! Can you lift me now?"_

_            "Hahaha. Sure." _

            And he would. He'd lift her up, complain on how she weighed a ton, and show her the fruit she loved so much. She'd smile and kiss his cheek while she was up there, then complain that he was holding her wrong. So, the boy would lower her, pat her head, then buy some strawberries for her. 

            'Stop! Don't you dare cry! Itachi would never cry! DON'T!' the boy ordered his mind. And he did not cry. His face remained emotionless. It remained rigid, hard. He stalked past the foods, and stood on line. No meat for Sasuke this week. He was running out of money, and had to grasp every penny. Once it was his turn to pay, the lady at the cashier smiled at him, and said,

            "You that Uchiha boy?" The black haired boy nodded quickly, and took out his wallet, getting his money in order. He knew what was next,

            "Oh. Well, yah know, you don't gotta pay for this, sugar." The boy wanted to scream endlessly into a pillow. Instead, he took a deep breath and told the woman that he had enough money and he could very well pay for the food. 

            "Come now, honey. I ain't takin' your money, kay? Your foods on the house. Now, why don't cha go out and see a movie or somethin'? Do something fun, kay?" The boy forced himself not the frown and said that her boss might get mad if he got all this food for free. His hand swept above the food to indicate that he had a lot there, even though he didn't even have twenty dollars worth.

            "I am the boss." 

            "Oh."

            "Next!"

            The boy sucked in his pride, thanked the woman for her kindness, walked out of the store, and kicked a rock so hard it would drive a hole through the person it hit.

            When he got home, he trained.

            And trained.

            His hands became bloody and bruised after several hours. His mind screamed for him to stop, but he didn't. He had to ignore it. That was the only way he could become stronger.

            He needed to become stronger.

            The boys mind numbed, and his lips broke apart to say a single word.

            "Sharingan."

            His eyes turned red, and he fought to keep it up. He fought to make it stronger. 

            After a while, he collapsed. His eyes turned from warrior red, to innocent black.

            The eyes of a boy who had seen hell, and now lived in it. The eyes of a boy whose scars ran past his hands, but dug deep, and ran into his heart. Into his mind.

            Into his eyes.

(Jenrya: WOW! That took a while!  I'm sorry this seems a bit....bad, but this is hard to write. Next chapter is the last one. But, you guys saw that right? How I was going through his life after the Uchiha Clans demise and paralleling it with his present day life? Well, anyway, I NEED IDEAS!!! HELP ME PEOPLE!!! I know you guys have ideas!! I will give credit if you want it. You could even email me with an idea, just put, "FF.Net Fanfic" as the subject. Now....review!!)


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

(Jenrya Lee: Wow. I've been gone for...quite some time! Blame school. ^^ Anyway, this is an extremely important note. In the last chapter, I seemed to have not written clearly enough that Ichiga is NOT Sasuke's sister, but Yuki's sister, thus, she is Sasuke's _cousin._ This is my fault, and I am sorry if this confused anyone. I'll try not to make another mistake like this again. THANK YOU AQUA SO MUCH FOR YOUR HELP! I dedicate this chapter to you! So, read on!)

_Four years later/ Age Twelve_

            A raven haired boy rubbed his sore hands. His training had drained him of all his energy. He frowned. He was no longer a big fish in a little pond, but a small fish in a big pond. His mind wandered to his brother, like it always did. Sasuke rubbed the seal on his neck. Going through something like that, with only a one in ten chance of getting out of it alive....it changed him so much. He was so much stronger now. Was Kakashi trying to save him that time...or just stop him from being as strong as he possibly could? He didn't know who was on his side anymore. So much had happened in a year that his head hurt. He stared at his cold cereal with distaste and frowned. 

            _Knock knock knock._

The boy raised his head to the source of the sound. The door. His hand automatically hovered over his kunai. A million thoughts rushed through his head. Another knock, then a voice.

            "Hey, Sasuke! Open the door! Kakashi sent us here for some stupid reason..." Naruto's loud, annoying, irritating voice passed freely through the thick wooden door into the raven-haired boy's house. He frowned, but opened the door just the same. He didn't really care if they came in. It wouldn't make the slightest difference to him. He merely stared at them, waiting for an explanation.

            "Kakashi wanted us to wait here since he had to run an errand or something. Can we come in?" Sakura asked, peeking over Sasuke's shoulder to see what his house looked like. The pale boy merely shrugged and opened the door fully, allowing his teammates to enter his house. The boy seemed to laugh quietly at an internal joke.

            'Teammates? Yeah, I'm sure...'

             The pink haired maiden looked slightly...crestfallen. Her dream boy lived in an average house, that was dark and stuffy and small. But her eyes wandered to his floor, where she saw that something red had seeped into the wooden floor many years before. She wanted to examine the stain closer, to see if it was blood. She knelt to touch it, and was hit with a wave of emotion. So much pain happened in this house. So many tears. She could _feel _it.

            "Wow. Your house is very nice, Sasuke!" Sakura peeped, smiling warmly at him. Again, all she was rewarded with was a cold glance. "Um...Oh! I'm sorry! It's still early in the morning...I hope I didn't wake–"

            "No one is here but me."

            "Really? Where are your parents? I heard the Uchiha clan was huge..." The dark eyed boy didn't answer her question, only rubbed his forehead. "Very nice pajamas!" The boys face turned red. A certain blond boy would have laughed if he wasn't currently slightly sorry for the other boy due to the situation he was in.

            "I woke up late. Let me change." He walked out of the room.

            Sakura waited for Sasuke to leave before turning to Naruto. "What is with him?" 

            "Don't push the subject Sakura."

            "Do you know something I don't?" No response. "You do, don't you?" Again, no response. Then, suddenly, from elsewhere in the house, a loud, "OH, CRAP!" Sasuke ran down the stairs, clearly angered.

            "Get out!" He yelled, only half dressed. His pale chest was clearly visible, with all of it's dark scars and bandages. His coarse breath made his chest rise and fall. His face was white with rage. His hands shook. "You can't stay here today! No way! I explained it to Kakashi, so why he told you to come here, I don't know. But I am skipping training today. So get out." He pointed to the door with one thin, long finger. They couldn't stay. They couldn't know. He'd never let anyone see him as he really was. 

            Sakura respectively turned her head away from Sasuke, and spoke.

            "Kakashi told us if we left you, we'd fail. So, obviously, he knew you'd kick us out. But I don't want to fail, so we're going with you!" The pink-haired girl couldn't bring herself to leave him. He looked as cold as ever, as mean as ever, but his soul was exposed. She could almost look into his heart and see...and see what pain it held.

            "Don't get yourself in the middle of what you cannot understand! You can't come with me! Today is a very important day for the clan!" The pale skinned, dark haired, black eyed, emotionless boy seemed in pain. Like talking about this enigmatic thing hurt too much. Like if he explained it, his body wouldn't be able to handle it. Like he'd just shrivel up and die. The green eyed girl thought for a moment, then shook her head. 

            "I'm sure we can come with you!" Again, she got a glimpse at the other boy's soul. His face turned dark and melancholy, his head slightly lowered toward the floor. He glared at the same spot on the floor for a long time, and his glare was so hard, the girl thought he might burn a hole right through it.

            "You're not appropriately dressed." This time, there was ice in his voice. Ice so cold that it seemed to drop the room temperature. Ice that matched the wall around his heart. Ice that flowed through his veins. Ice that became part of his own being. If that ice left...what would he have left?

            Finally, the blond spoke. 

            "Where are you going?" No longer was his voice loud and aggravating, but softer, and gentler. As if he was speaking to a child who could break at any moment.

            The other boy did not answer, but only left the room. He came back, dressed in a black suit, holding flowers. He stormed out of the house without a word. His pace was fast and hard, like if he stopped, the world would end.  His world would end. He lost too much...he shouldn't be dressed in black holding flowers wearing a suit walking fast trying to hide everything trying to be normal trying to get revenge trying to–

            He stopped walking. He heard his teammates call out to him, telling him to wait for them. 

            _'Friends don't exist...'_

            He continued walking. His legs hurt. His heart hurt. His mind hurt.

            His teammates' voices sounded distant and far. Sasuke was just so wrapped up within himself that he didn't notice that he had reached his destination.

            The Cemetery, Uchiha Section.

            He stood there, unknowing to the fact that his face was wet with tears. He held the flowers to his chest, and walked toward his mothers grave. He heard footsteps behind him and didn't bother turning around. He didn't need to turn around. He know who was there. He knew the people, the hypocrites, behind him. First, Sakura, claiming that all children without parents grew up 'wrong'...

            No. No, that was _true_. Crying yourself to sleep at night, isolating yourself from the rest of the world, training until your veins screamed, until your blood boiled with pain, until the tears and blood mixed so that you couldn't tell which was which, so that you couldn't tell which boy was which....that wasn't normal at all. 

            Naruto. Pretending to be happy, carefree, without a care in the world. He must hurt, just as I do. He must hurt inside, he must die inside, he must be empty inside, he _must_. He has to be. He must wake up at night reaching for his parents, holding them, then realizing it was all a dream. Realizing that he hadn't held them in years. Realizing that no one has held him in years. The tears flowed now, revealing the tortured boys soul. Revealing the mind of the tortured boy. He held the flowers tighter, and the thorns dug into his hand. But he did not wince, for the pain from the thorns on his hand was nothing compared to the thorns around his heart. He got on his knees, sat in front of the tombstone, hugging it, crying on it. If it was any consolation to him, well, then at least his parents were under that tombstone. And holding on to it forever might make his parents underneath realize that they had a son waiting for them to come back. Waiting for them to open their eyes. Waiting for them to hug him, hold him. 

            He felt two pairs of arms wrapping around his body, drawing him close. He felt two bodies close to him, full of love and care for him. He looked up, and their faces were blurred by his tears. But he made out their faces just fine. 

            Sakura and Naruto.

            He sobbed on them, letting all of his walls down. Letting them all collapse and fall and burn and break and crumble and....they were destroyed. Letting the pain escape the thorned wall and escape through his throat.

            "I miss them....I miss them so much...It's not fair..." He felt the girl's fingers run through his hair, telling him that everything would be okay, that the world was not over.

            And slowly, from within the depths of his mind, his world stopped ending. The sun had finally come out, and drenched the whole city in light. In warmth. He could not stop wailing. He could not stop crying. But his heart was still healing. He became a normal boy, longing for his parents. Longing to once again smile amongst the pain and suffering and hurt. And he was getting there. He heard another voice, just as soft as the girl's.

            "We won't leave you, Sasuke. We're right here." said the loud, annoying blond. But he was no longer loud and annoying, but gentle and soft.  Just like the girl was. Only then did the dark eyed, formerly emotionless boy realize he was begging for them not to leave him.  Begging for them to stay with him. Telling them he had nothing left but them, and he never admitted it, but he was lonely and full of hurt. 

            _"Grow up so that you may kill me."_

            Those words rung through his head. No. He would not let some distant, intangible shadow from his past rule his life. 

            Sasuke Uchiha would grow up so that he would be content. He would no longer be the boy who lost his parents and lived for revenge, he would be the boy who saw his parents die, but was able to live and see another day. 

            He lived. And he was happy for that.

            Right there and then, Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto stood. The blond boy patted the black-as-night haired boy on the back, and asked him if he was ok. He nodded in response. The pink haired girl asked him the same question. He gave the same answer. And smiled.

            Several feet away, stood Kakashi. Smiling.

            And up in heaven, stood the Uchiha clan. Smiling.

**_The End_**

(Jenrya: There it is. I really hope you enjoyed it! I sure as heck enjoyed writing it! Review! Recommend it to a friend!  Tell THEM to review! ^^ I'd like to thank Aqua for a lot of the info I used in this chapter and Jesse, The Duelist of the Sands for being my Beta-Reader on this chapter. Thank you.)


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